58 days to go

58 days to go. Weird feeling. On the one hand I want to be home right now. With my friends and my family. I miss random stuff like my pans at home in my kitchen. Or my supermarket. Or my plants (Benny <3). But on the other hand I'm scared to go home. Scared because I know I will miss Perugia and all my friends here so much. When I left in August I knew I will see all my friends again because I would be back after some months but here I will probably see a lot of people never ever again in my life and that upsets me.
But I'm also scared because I don't know what expects me at home. What has changend during one year? Who is in a relationship and has no time now anymore for me. Who is writting their Master thesis? Some friends didn't write me at all while I was abroad and even forgot my birthday. I think I'm not able to forget that. At some point it's just enough. Some of them I already kicked out on Facebook.

I mean friendship is something you should appreciate and try to work on. In german we have a proverb: "Freundschaft ist wie eine Pflanze. Man muss sie gießen damit sie wächst" (Friendship is like a plant. You have to water it so it can grow). And I really believe in that. If someone is not interested in watering this plant then go to hell! I will find others who will water it willingly.

So here I am now sitting in my room while it is raining and I'm quite confused. One year ago things were weird as well: Leaving everything you know for an adventure. Don't know exactly where to go, how to survive and totally alone in a country where you can't really speak the language. I still know how I told a friend who went for 6 months to Mexico last february that this will be the adventure of his life. Actually at that time I was not just thinking about him but about my adventure as well. And now this adventure goes to end - still slowly because there are 58 days to go - but it will end soon enough.
So what did I expect of this adventure and what didi I get? Difficult questions. And I guess I will answer them another time. But I thing it's a lot what I experienced here during the last months. I would not say I'm a totally different person but still I think I changed somehow. I learnd so much stuff, I grew up and became even more self-confident. So I guess this Annie  now could handle a lot of other situations as well which are coming now or will come in the future.